ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
