Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
