i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
