Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
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