I think I am morally bankrupt
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I stole a fireplace last night.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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