So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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