Just cropdusted the office
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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