So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize