I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
