Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
