I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
