The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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