He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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