just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
