I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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