i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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