Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize