Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
