Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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