my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Randomize