You're a womanizer and a bitch.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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