Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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