Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
