i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Did you pee in the oven last night??
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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