I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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