Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Oh god it's open bar.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
