Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
