Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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