He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
where does the pee come out of this thing
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
