that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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