How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
