I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize