Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
