At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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