everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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