I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
