are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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