So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
