I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
