mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
And then he peed in my hair
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