please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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