my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
