Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
