i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
