I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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