I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
