can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
