he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
