He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
