Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
